What’s spiritual, what’s not?

The other day I ran across a review of the book I co-wrote with Cheryl Savageau, Parents of Missionaries. The reviewer is also a POM (parent of a missionary), and overall she wrote a positive review.

But a couple of her comments trouble me.

First, she questioned why we included chapters on key life issues parents must face to thrive as POMs—grief, the empty-nest marriage, relating well to adult children, and special circumstances that affect coping ability (for example, death of a spouse, divorce, poor health, and depression).

Second, she wrote, “I found the book to be light on spiritual insight and solutions.”

So I’m wondering, just what does it mean to be spiritual?

David railed at God about his enemies time and time again. He always concluded that he would allow God to be in charge. But was only his conclusion spiritual? Wasn’t bringing his complaints to God spiritual as well?

Jesus taught us not to worry and not to be afraid. But does that mean we have to ignore and deny the worried and scared feelings we experience in order to be spiritual? Isn’t it spiritual to sit still, acknowledge our worries and fears, feel them, and then deal with them according to Scripture?

Paul wrote that we should love one another, accept one another, serve one another, speak the truth in love to one another. He tells us to work out our salvation—in other words, to take responsibility for our lives and grow in character to be more like Christ.

Isn’t it spiritual to learn to deal with conflict, love a spouse, reconcile with a child, a friend, or a parent? Isn’t it spiritual to decide to control only what we can exercise control over—ourselves—and to live without judging or manipulating others to try to get what we want?

I’m convinced it is.

Praying about these things is good, but prayer alone won’t make them happen. God is always sovereign, always working, always good, and we’re to trust him and depend on him—but there’s a path for us to follow and things for us to do on that path—actions that make a difference in us and influence others too.

Henry Cloud wrote in How People Grow,  “All growth is spiritual growth.” I love that because it pulls together all aspects of my life into one whole. “In him we live and move and have our being” (Acts 17:28, NIV).

I’m Martha

I’m not a perfectionist about most things (writing and editing, yes). I don’t have the housekeeping gene. I’d much rather sit in the shade with a good book or be part of an engaging conversation than fix a meal for a crowd.

Recently though, I saw in Scripture that I’m Martha. Yes, Martha. Of the Mary and Martha sister act in Luke 10.

You know the story. Jesus came to the sisters’ home for dinner. (Martha is the one who “opened her home to him.” I wonder if that means she invited him. We don’t know when Jesus met Lazarus, brother to this famous duo. It could have been that night.)

There surely was a crowd—Jesus rarely went anywhere by himself except to pray. Mary sat at Jesus’ feet, listening to him teach, while Martha fretted and gave orders in the kitchen. Finally she’d had enough and complained to Jesus about her sister’s priorities.

I’ve always identified with Mary. But . . . I’m Martha.

Not because I’d be the one leading the kitchen charge if Jesus came to dinner. No. I’m Martha because I want to control things. Martha’s big dinner was her idea, as far as we know.

I have similar ideas about how some things should be . . . what other people should think and do (especially when their behavior impacts me), what God should do about what other people think and do, what I want other people to think about me and do for me.

It’s not that these things I care about are always wrong. Sometimes they are legitimate; other times not so much. But I don’t want to be a controller like Martha, because that’s not how God says his work gets done. His work gets done when I let him help me control myself and I give him control of everyone and everything else.

Martha gets more grief from people than she deserves, however. Much more than Jesus gave her. He told her she was missing out on the best part of the evening—spending time with him. He said she was “worried and upset about many things” unnecessarily. But later, after Lazarus died, Jesus talked with Martha and gently helped her reaffirm her faith in him. How wonderful to get to tell him face-to-face that you believe he’s who he says he is!

Martha learned something from all of this, I’m certain. Because not long after Jesus brought Lazarus back to life, “a dinner was given in Jesus’ honor. Martha served” (John 12:2).

No theatrics in the kitchen. Just peaceful service.

So, yes, I’m Martha—a woman of faith who’s learning.

Warm, fuzzy, and “spiritual”

Another Thomas Nelson Book Review Blogger post…

If you enjoy collecting clever one-liners about how to succeed in life, The Noticer might be a gold mine. But if you’re looking for good writing and a great story, look somewhere else.

The Noticer opens with a chapter about Andrews himself (although it takes reading his website to figure this out) as a young man—bereft of both parents, homeless, sleeping under a pier or in someone’s garage. An almost angelic old guy called Jones shows up to talk with him and help him see his life from a different perspective (perspective being what Jones says can change our lives).

Then it’s chapter after chapter of the same thing: Jones showing up at just the right moment to talk—at length—with somebody else in trouble in Orange Beach, Alabama. Until—surprise!—at the end of the book Jones mysteriously disappears, and everyone who knew him is—surprise!—very sad but grateful for the wisdom he spoke into their lives.

Sigh.

How we think does affect our lives. And most of the perspective doled out in The Noticer lines up with biblical truth. But readers who don’t know that when they start the book won’t know it when they’re finished either. They’ll just think it’s warm, fuzzy, and “spiritual.” When Jones disappears, he leaves a letter reminding everyone that the best is yet to come, after all.

Oh, I know—maybe someone will ask what these readers think about the book. As they discuss it with a caring Christian friend, then they’ll figure out that the God of the Bible is the one to go to for advice.

Maybe.

I know I’ll be in the minority on this one. I wish I could embrace the book as a sensation. But I’m saddened when the Savior is left out of things and when less-than-average work gets five-star hype.

The Noticer, Andy Andrews, Thomas Nelson, Inc., hardcover, $17.99

The vegan report

It’s been two months since we started our vegan experiment. Offiically, we ended it at an Easter egg hunt the day before Easter, when we ate fried chicken from the Kroger’s in Madeira, Ohio (not all Kroger chicken being created equal).

The first bites were delish. But after that, not so much.

I went to lunch with a friend that week and ordered a baked potato with a side of chili. I felt surprised at discovering meat in the chili. I ate it . . . but right now there is meatless chili in my crock pot.

During our six weeks of trying this different kind of eating, Ed and I weren’t quite as strict as Sheila and Scoggins, who were doing it as a fast. We ate fish several times, and eggs a few times. Ed—having grown up (a long time ago!) with a milk habit—found that one of the hardest aspects to deal with.

So we’ll never be truly vegan. But I don’t think we’ll be galloping back to our old habits, either. It feels too good to eat the foods God gave us in the beginning; our physical bodies feel happier and lighter somehow. The health benefits over time seem hard to argue with.

Eating more unprocessed foods, much less meat, and much less refined flour and sugar—it’s not the typical American diet.

But I think it is a good thing.

This DVD misses its audience

A Thomas Nelson Book Review Blogger review.

Kids today are more visual than ever. They read less and view more on TV and online—that’s not news. Publishers see themselves as “content producers” rather than book publishers and look for ways to repurpose book content into other kinds of products—that’s not news either.

What would be news would be a good children’s Bible storybook leveraged into a great DVD. Sadly, I don’t think that happened with Thomas Nelson’s new Read and Share™ DVD Bible, Volume 1.

Like the original book–the Read and Share Bible by Gwen Ellis–the DVD aims at preschoolers. But the narration moves too slowly and sounds too flat to hold these youngest viewers. Even having male and female narrators doesn’t really help, and the character voices—even though quite a few different voice actors are used—all sound a lot alike.

The colorful animation style fits preschoolers well. But some of the stories—like Laban tricking Jacob and giving him Leah instead of Rebekah, or Jesus being tempted in the wilderness by Satan (a guy in a hooded robe but without a head or face)—seem beyond the understanding of preschoolers.

I noticed a few biblical inaccuracies too—especially Jacob waving good-bye to Laban as he heads back home to Canaan and the prodigal son actually eating from the pig’s trough instead of simply longing to.

The bonus features don’t save the day. The instructions for accessing the coloring pages didn’t work. The “interviews with real kids” consist of asking a roomful of antsy preschoolers about their favorite story—with “Moses” and “Jesus” the predictable answers. “Behind the Scenes” does provide an interesting look at how computerized animation works—but again, this is over the heads of the intended audience.

Read and Share™ DVD Bible, Volume 1, Thomas Nelson, 2008, $14.99

Armed

When I edited children’s books about fifteen years ago, I bought an easy-reader manuscript eventually published as Devotions for Young Readers. Think Frog and Toad and you’ll have the idea. Big type, extra space between words and letters, and line breaks at the end of small units of thought make reading a little easier task for those just starting out.

I loved the concept of Devotions for Young Readers. The author spoke directly to children about common experiences and made connections to relationship with God that they could understand.

One of the original devotions in the manuscript never made it into print.  I asked the author to take it out.

The subject was the armor of God. Horrors—the author suggested that every morning children should arm themselves for their day, as in go through the motions of pretending to put on a helmet, a breastplate, a belt, and shoes and picking up a sword and a shield. I gently suggested that many families would find that extreme and we probably should look for another topic.

Sigh. I understand more now than I did then, for sure.

“Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. . . . Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God” (Ephesians 6:10-17, NIV).

These days I try to remember to start out armed. I like to start at the top and work down:

Helmet of salvation—I know that I’m a rescued one.

Breastplate of righteousness—Because of Jesus, I am clean.

Belt of truth—I know what is real.

Shoes of the readiness of the gospel of peace—I’m ready to interact peacefully with others, and I have a message of peace with God to share.

Sword of the Spirit—God’s wonderful, living, and active Word.

Shield of faith—The Lord himself is our shield.

In the past year or so, I’ve prayed Scriptures about truth over the lies of a difficult situation. I’ve reminded myself about who God says I am when I didn’t feel anything at all like what he says. I’ve tried to wait peacefully on the Lord rather than fretting; I’ve tried to offer peace to others. I’ve struggled to find my voice and speak words of truth. I’ve positioned myself behind the Lord and decided to trust him more.

I’ve found this armor works.

But it’s hard for me to remember what I’m wearing. And sometimes I’d rather duck than stand and fight.

Want to join me in an experiment? Put your armor on today and go through the day remembering what you’re wearing. Then use it. And let me know what happens.

New light on an old lie

A Thomas Nelson Book Review Blogger post . . .

On my own I wouldn’t have chosen to read this book. I might have picked it up, but I would have decided I didn’t have time for it. After all, if you know the Word well and can use it to spot false teaching, you might not want to read 400+ pages about people you already know are deceptive and goofy.

But I learned a few things in the pages of Hank Hanegraff’s Christianity in Crisis: 21st Century that I might have otherwise missed.

I didn’t realize the extent that “Word of Faith” teaching reaches beyond physical healing and financial prosperity to mislead people about the nature of God, man, Satan, and Christ, or how greatly it skews the atonement of Christ.

And I didn’t realize that some currently popular teachers who seem quite committed to the Word of God have said some things that contradict it mightily.

An updated and revised version of a book by the author twenty years ago, this one is well organized and easy to follow, even if repetitious at points. It’s well documented, with an extensive bibliography, several indexes, and plenty of endnotes. “Error Begets Error” sections at the end of each chapter show the effects today of the false teachings set in motion  decades ago. The last part of the book is devoted to helping readers clearly grasp basic apologetics for biblical Christian faith. The book’s title is a bit of a misnomer, since the Word of Faith movement is not the only false teaching creating crisis within the church today.

In fact, the biggest take-away of the book for me was seeing a connection between the  “you are a little god” Word of Faith teaching and the “you can achieve unity with God…God is in everyone” progression so obvious in some leaders of the emerging church movement and the New Age and Christian-mystic writers they often quote. It’s the same lie, with the same goal, just repackaged to appeal to different kinds of folks.

Christianity in Crisis: 21st Century, by Hank Hanegraaff  (Thomas Nelson, hardcover, $22.99)

Popcorn is a plant food

Since doing what I can to stay healthy is one of the things I care about, for the next four weeks (at least) I’m experimenting with a whole-foods, plant-based, no-animal-products—vegan—diet! It helps that Sheila and Scoggins are doing this too and that Ed has agreed to go along for the fun.

Sheila and Scoggins are doing this as a Lenten fast, as they did a couple of times with their Orthodox friends when they lived in Bosnia. (Sheila’s got lots of vegan recipes—last night it was Eggplant-Potato Mousakka, yum! Tonight we ate the leftovers, and tomorrow night will be a chickpea and fresh spinach combo with Indian spices.)

What got me interested in trying to eat vegan is a new book called The Engine 2 Diet. I caught just enough of author Rip Esselstyn’s appearance on the Today show to be intrigued. The whole-foods and plant-foods aspects of the diet resemble the advice in Healthy Aging too. In that book Dr. Andrew Weil discusses how inflammation affects the body and causes disease, and he advocates what he calls the anti-inflammatory diet.

If these guys are right, a month from now all four of us should be looking slimmer and trimmer and feeling much more energetic. (Although it’s hard to imagine Sheila and Scoggins much slimmer or trimmer or more energetic than they already are!)

Two days into this, I’m feeling good about it. But the need to snack is going to hit soon, and when it does I know I’ll be glad that popcorn is a plant food.

Validation, part 2

Yesterday I wrote about the importance of validating others by seeking to acknowledge and understand the feelings and experiences of others. Then I found this post from my friend Jen Taylor. It’s about a friend of Jen’s, a Christian who works on a church staff, who has experienced a string of difficult circumstances with little validation from other believers. Now the friend’s little puppy, Milo, needs stomach surgery to make it to adult dog-hood, and once again Christians have been less than accepting of how Jen’s friend feels.

If you care about how Christians treat one another, Jen’s post is worth a read.

And Jen has set up a ChipIn fund to get Milo his surgery. She’s paying the first $500 herself. Even $5 contributions will help. Several donations have been made already. (They’re not showing up on the counter yet, but Jen says that can take a while.)

Jen gets a shout out from me for this effort to do something tangible to validate her friend.  Want to help? Just click here.

Validation

A few weeks back, Mike Hyatt blogged about the importance of validating the good in other people. He wrote:

“I want to be a validator to others—a reminder of God’s good intentions toward them. I want to affirm that God is for them not against them. That His plans for them are good. That He has given to each person I encounter unique gifts, talents, and strengths. May God give me the grace to see it and acknowledge it.”

Me too. I’m working on it.

There’s another aspect of validation that Hyatt didn’t touch on. In Loving People: How to Love and Be Loved (Thomas Nelson, 2007), Dr. John Townsend says that everyone needs to have his experiences and feelings validated by others. What does this look like?

It means trying to hear and understand others’ experiences the way they experience and feel them, and communicating back that we do. (More listening than talking!)

When we do this, Townsend explains, we are telling the other person, in effect,  “What you are saying and feeling is real, and I’m taking it seriously, because I take you seriously” (p. 63).

All this contributes to creating connection, which humans crave because we were created to need it.

So who have you validated lately, or who has given the gift of validation to you?